Empowered Joy LLC

Sharing the Journey

Thoughts From a Fellow Traveler

Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

Dear Fellow Travelers,

If any of the thoughts, ideas or experiences I've shared here touch you in some way, I'd love to hear from you,

Joyful Blessings,

Sherry

Not All Days Are Diamonds

Posted on Saturday, November 03, 2018 5:09 PM

Dear Fellow Travelers,

John Denver let us know years ago that “some days are diamonds, some days are stones.” None of us has only diamond days throughout life, so what do we do with the stones?

It’s difficult to plant a flower bed or vegetable garden if the ground is full of stones. We have to find a way to get rid of the stones and create a place where we can dig, plant and make certain that water will reach whatever we’re growing. In a day that we might consider a stone, we don’t have the option to toss the stone to the side or cart it off in a wheel barrow like we do when planning a garden. So, what can be done with those days?

Generally what makes a day a stone is that we're feeling anxious, angry, frustrated or stuck in some way because life is currently other than what we had planned or desired. When this happened to me recently, I remembered something Abraham said about noticing what is satisfying in a given moment. Even though I was feeling low about the current situation, I allowed myself to acknowledge what felt good in that exact second of time. First I noticed a small vase of dried flowers on the wall, then the lovely autumn day outside the window and the sound of leaves falling. In doing this, the heaviness I was feeling was lifted ever so slightly as I gave myself permission for my day and life to be more than the sadness and negative thoughts. After a few minutes, my mind opened to a positive aspect in the situation that was troubling me.

Try this for yourself the next time your day feels like a rock. In the presence of whatever has captured your attention, see if you can find one small detail wherever you are – something visual, something you can hear, taste or feel - something that your senses tell you is pleasing to you or as Abraham-Hicks would say, satisfying. Shift your focus from whatever has grabbed your attention and held you ransom. Have the leaves begun to turn colors creating a landscape of vibrant color? Do your socks feel particularly soft and comfortable? Can you hear your puppy snoring softly as she naps? What’s present in your environment into which you can dive with your attention?

Find that one tiny detail in the moment that brings you pleasure, that is a pleasing sensation to your mind and body. As you do, you will notice a tiny shift in your mindset that brings a greater feeling of possibility. Next look again at the situation that is unsatisfying and see how you can change the thought about it into a way that this can be of benefit to you. Where can you shift your thought to see something new? What can you reach for that wasn’t there before? A rainy day that “ruins” your outdoor plans can be a blessing in disguise if you’re behind on laundry, needing a day to veg out or wishing you had more time to read the book you bought last year. This isn’t to say that disappointment is wrong, but let your energy flow from “stone” closer to “diamond” and unblock the flow of energy.

Remember my reference above to creating a garden when the land is full of rocks? One of the many things tourists find so enjoyable about Ireland are the rolling hills covered in serpentine stone walls. They pull off on the sides of roads to gaze and breathe deep breaths of satisfaction. Calendars are full of these types of images and prints adorn walls. Did the Irish decide all those decades ago that rocks would make a lovely wall? I believe most of our Irish ancestors would say that the rocks were seen as a burden, but one they turned to their advantage.

The next time something in your life is weighing you down, try this:

Find something pleasing in the moment, no matter how small.

Focus on it intensely until you feel a shift in your energy.

It will feel as if space has opened in your heart and/or mind.

Be open to how you can see benefit in the situation.

This will take some concentrated effort on your part, but as you begin to practice the new behavior, it will become easier. Essentially what you want to do is become so good at shifting the negative thoughts that life becomes an open canvas for you.

Even in the deconstruction of a current situation that is pleasing to you, the potential of new things coming into your life is present. See how you can refocus and take your power back. If you feel stuck in your efforts, it would be my honor to help. As an Aroma Freedom Technique Practitioner, I can guide you through a simple, effective process to shift your perspective toward an empowered mindset.

Blessings & Light,

Sherry

Growing Through Jealousy

Dear Fellow Travelers,

Have you ever been jealous of someone? (Silly question, I know.) How do you feel when you experience jealousy? Does it feel like serendipitous joy over the good fortune for the other person while still acknowledging how much you’d like to be in his or her shoes? Is it an angry, agitated sensation? Do you feel low and despondent? How do you feel about yourself when you realize you’re experiencing jealousy? Does guilt rear its ugly head ready to pounce from the shadows? Do you feel frustrated with yourself or even ashamed? Since childhood, we’ve been taught that jealousy is a bad thing. I’d like to offer a different perspective and suggest that if you’re willing to be honest with yourself about your own jealousy that it can lead you to abundance and freedom.

I believe jealousy is a two-sided coin. You can tell which side of the coin you’re focused on by how you feel. There are times in life when a friend achieves something that we’d like for ourselves and, even though we feel envious, we are still able to be authentically happy for that person. Then there are times when the focus is slanted a bit more toward the pity party end of the spectrum and the feeling is sadness. At both of these times we can interpret our reaction as a message from our own heart about what we desire, but have yet to manifest. This is a great place to be. In these situations we can set an intention, make a plan and then look for whatever mental and emotional blocks are keeping us from realizing this in our own lives. This type of experience is a great gift as it causes us to stretch into possibility. The key to using this side of the coin is to not let the desire go unnoticed. Jump into the joy that the other person is experiencing and own it for yourself. It will give you energetic momentum like drafting off a car on the highway. Immerse yourself in your own vision and don’t get bogged down trying to figure out all the details. Dr. Benjamin Perkus, founder of the Aroma Freedom Technique, says, “Our job is what, God’s job is how.” Do the mediation, add the desire to your manifesting list, create the vision board, and work with a healer to release what’s got you contracting in fear or doubt rather than expanding into your dream.

The other side of the coin is when we feel something almost akin to hatred for another person for having something or being in a particular situation. At these times, seeing someone realize something we desire causes us intense pain. The message, in this case, is about where we have wounds that need healing. We may be reacting from a belief in scarcity and, at a subconscious level, believe the other person’s having this actually makes it more difficult for us to have or experience it. We’re unable to live in the possibility of our own desires and don’t want anyone else to either. We may smile and express happiness for the other person while deep inside we’re screaming. Being in this place often makes us bitter, unproductive and can make us very mean spirited. This is a good place to be IF we can be honest with ourselves about what we’re feeling and examine our inner voice. If we do, we will gain access to healing. The key to using this side of the coin is self-honesty. Understand that the reaction is not who you are, it’s an emotional response driven by an emptiness you feel. Track the emptiness, take ownership of your own life. Work with a healer to help you dig out the roots of resentment, regrets and feelings of rejection. Freeing yourself of these 3 will give you space to create what you truly want. Consider a Gratitude journal, do a daily self-love/acceptance meditation or a meditation to release anger, guilt & shame. Once you’ve owned your own vibration and let go of the negative internal talk about yourself and others, you will no longer feel the sting of other people’s good fortune like an arrow to your heart. You will be ready to flip the coin and begin manifesting what you desire.

Most of us, have had at least one experience on both sides of the coin. What’s important is to see and interpret the message for what it is. The next time the Green Eyed Monster invites you dance, be honest with yourself about your feelings and see them as valuable information. They will either be giving the signal to begin manifesting or indicating there is a wound that needs to be healed. Either way, use the information to move closer to abundance and happiness. As always, if I can assist along your journey, it would be my honor to do so.

Blessings & Light,

Sherry

“Jealousy is an activated awareness of the difference between

where you are and where you want to be.”

~ Abraham

Seeking the Good In Life

Sherry Coffman: Posted on Tuesday, November 21, 2017 12:59 PM

Dear Fellow Travelers,

What do you see when you look at this picture?

I see life, life in all its stages and a delicate balance between sorrow and joy. I see the past, withered and gone, the present in full bloom and also the promise of future growth. To me, this is life – the reality of life. It is not the perfect fairytale picture we may have dreamed of as children nor is it the Greek tragedy we studied in school. It’s a constant flux of what we accept gladly into our lives along with those things we’d rather not receive. We must decide on a daily basis where our focus will be.

Of course, this plant has not always looked like this. When I brought it home from the nursery, it was full of luscious blooms and green leaves. There were no withered, dry, dead parts. But this plant had a shock. While I was away from home for some days the weather was hot and dry and it went without the water it needed. Now it’s in the recovery stage. I know how it feels. I had a shock around the same time due to the death of my brother. In my mourning of what was and my struggle to accept what is, it’s not easy to reach for what can be. My life is currently one of getting used to a new “normal”, one I never wanted to imagine even though I knew the day would come, sooner or later.

As I think of my brother’s life and the gift he has been to me, what has been foremost in my mind is the way he chose to live the past 15 years. He had something of a transformation in his 50’s when his health forced him into early retirement. He had been a widower for a few years already at that time and many men would have given in to despair becoming couch potatoes until it was their time to move on. Instead, he used his creativity and intelligence to craft something that reached beyond mere existence into a lifestyle that not only gave him pleasure, but supported others in their creative efforts and desires. Whenever he felt low, he would look for a project that could add value to someone else’s life as well as his own. I believe it was this that kept him with us many years more than anticipated, given his health issues. Creating a business around the credo: “In the highest good of all.” his wire wrap jewelry brought joy to hundreds. His symbol was the hummingbird as it represents a reminder to seek the good in life and beauty in each day. Not realizing it before, I can see now that my brother was giving me a model to follow after his transition.

My brother was my first friend and for the past 15 years, my best friend. At this point it’s difficult, at times, to imagine ever being truly happy again, but I know it will come. Sadness sometimes feels like a mantle I will carry from this point forward, but it lightens as the weeks go by. What makes life powerful is our understanding of how we fit into the cycle and part of that cycle is death.

The questions is: “How do we face loss?” whether that is through the passing of a loved one, end of a relationship or demise of a dream? I remember feeling sadness at the end of a school year when I was a young child thinking that the next year my teacher might not be as kind or kids in my class might not like me. What if I had to sit somewhere that felt weird? Mixed with the uneasiness of leaving behind something that had become comfortable, there was also a bit of nervous anticipation for the unknown possibilities of the next year. This is the balance I desire in life. To be able to move forward understanding that even though something I’ve come to value, maybe even loved, has ended, there is still possibility ahead. That doesn’t mean there is no sadness at the end of a phase or relationship. We need to give ourselves permission to grieve, but we must also allow ourselves the freedom to move forward. It’s what I’m doing now.

A friend recently shared something with me that came from her mindfulness teacher:

Sadness is real, but suffering is something optional that we create

by wanting things to be different from how they are.

There are things, such as the death of a loved one, over which we have no power. We have to choose what our reaction will be. Will we accept it and move forward to the future or become stuck in the past?It’s our choice.

If you find yourself today feeling like parts of you are dying off, follow the example of my bougainvillea. Bloom in the ways you can even while you do what’s necessary to recover full strength. Life & death exist side by side in Nature as well as in our human experience. We can choose to see the beauty and new growth among what's spent. As always, if you feel you’d like some help with your journey, it would be my honor to assist you.

Blessings & Light,

Sherry

Dedicated to my brother.

Lee Alan Finney

Cognitha

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